With the holiday season comes gift-giving to our young people. Often, the gift box contains new technology for our teens and even younger children. The device could be a first cell phone, tablet, or even a laptop. When our young people exhaust playing with toys, we default to technology as the next level of gifts. My children are young adults now, but I can remember back to the iPod, laptops, Nintendo DS, Wii, and smartphones opened from the boxes at Christmas. For my son, we waited until 13 for his first phone, but for my daughter, we surprised her a year early at 12. As adults, we were in control, and we decided when they would get access. However, looking back, I would have delayed gifting some technology until later.
It does not have control when it is in the box, but once you open Pandora’s technology box, devices can control a person. It is hard enough as adults to have the willpower to set down our devices. Young people struggle even more without fully developed will-power or self-regulation. Healthy boundaries are good to provide and can benefit children’s mental health. Setting technology boundaries before a device is out of the box or turned on for the first time is the best practice.
Some best practices include setting up data limits. If the data runs out, they can still use the device as a phone or in Wi-Fi, but they have just exhausted their “connected time”. Most phones now come with a screen time feature that limits time on certain apps, at certain times of the day, or which apps can be downloaded. Use these features to help enforce the guidelines, but do not depend on them alone. The Internet is a dangerous playground for youth to access unsupervised. Set restrictions on which types of websites they can visit and ensure all Internet use is done in public spaces.
Phones also have helpful features, like knowing your children’s location or contacting them after school. Some educational apps will help youth study and learn about different topics. Show your youth how they can be content creators rather than just consumers. Many apps teach youth coding to create the app versus just consuming the app. Ohio 4-H just launched a program called Clovers CODE, which helps youth in 4-H learn to create apps and the code behind the app.
Modeling guidelines is also important. If your family rule is no phones in bedrooms, then have a family charging station in a central place in the home. Introduce a “no phones at dinner time” rule and abide by that. Show your children that immediate responses to their friends are not urgent and can wait by delaying your own replies. And instead of spending time on devices, enjoy time together this holiday playing family games.
As you wrap up all your boxes this holiday season, do not forget to think outside the box and set your family boundaries before the technology is gifted to your children.
Written by Mark D. Light, Ph.D., Leader, Ohio 4-H STEM & Digital Engagement Innovations
Reviewed by Jenny Lobb, MPH, Family and Consumer Sciences Educator, Ohio State University Extension Franklin County
References:
Abi-Jaoude, E., Naylor, K. T., & Pignatiello, A. (2020). Smartphones, social media use and youth mental health. Canadian Medical Associaton Journal, 192(6), E136-E141. https://www.cmaj.ca/content/192/6/E136
Dempsey, S., Lyons, S., & McCoy, S. (2019). Later is better: Mobile phone ownership and child academic development. Economic and Social Research Institute. http://aei.pitt.edu/101971/1/RB201903_01.pdf
Wiles, B. B., Schachtner, L., & Pentz, J. L. (2016). The New Screen Time: Computers, Tablets, and Smartphones Enter the Equation. Journal of Extension, 54(2), 10. https://tigerprints.clemson.edu/joe/vol54/iss2/10/
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